PEER PRESSURE ROSS SMITH
ALL REFERENCES FROM THE AMPLIFIED BIBLE UNLESS NOTED.
It is an unfortunate fact that many of us would deny that we are subject to peer pressure simply because our pride won’t allow us. If, however, we take time to evaluate our behaviour when confronted by different individuals or groups and analyse the decisions we have made, have they always been decisions in accordance with God’s word, or dictated by our conscience, or made to fit in with the individual or group? Do we always consider in great depth both the ethics and the ethos, or do we go with the crowd.?
PEER PRESSURE can be either positive or negative, although I have some ambivalence regarding the use of the term in relation to our spiritual life; it may more accurately be called “INFLUENCE”. PEER PRESSURE is normally exerted by those with the loudest voice whereas Ephesians 5:11 nominates the “INFLUENCE” of an exemplary life rather than an extemporary mouth.
There is a glaring example of peer pressure being effective at the highest levels recorded in the book of Luke.
Luke 23:22-24 A THIRD TIME (This is the peers wearing him down .. comments mine) he (Pilate) said to them, Why? What wrong has He done? I have found [no offense or crime or guilt] in Him nothing deserving of death; I will, therefore, chastise Him [in order to teach Him better] and release Him. But they were insistent and urgent, demanding with loud cries that He should be crucified. And their voices prevailed (Their “VOICES” not their “VALUES” .. comments mine) (accomplished their purpose). AND PILATE GAVE SENTENCE, THAT WHAT THEY ASKED SHOULD BE DONE.
Notice this was “THE THIRD TIME” that these people have molested Pilate with their demands, and they have worn him down, HE SUCCUMBED TO THE PEER PRESSURE OF THE POPULACE. It was “THEIR VOICES” not their VALUES that agitated the result, the same thing that often affects us as well.
EVEN THE BOSS BUCKLED
From this discourse is plain to see that “PEER PRESSURE” affects all and sundry, even to the highest levels of Government and in our own society small pressure groups are impacting our government policy. We were not meant to fit in, but to stand out. (Ephesians 5:11, “a life of contrast”)
The secularisation of the church is the direct consequence of “Peer Pressure”, LOUD VOICES WITH LOW VALUES, both from a compromised and ineffective leadership and also often preferred by double-minded congregations, wanting to be known as “Christian”, but siding with worldly practice, forfeiting blessing for buzz.
We must ask the question, who is our example or who causes us to respond in a particular fashion, be it for good or for evil? It surely is not the government of the day, we are more discerning than that but are obligated to pray for them. But insidiously it can be our family, our workmates, those with whom we fellowship and possibly even unidentified television stars or elite athletes. We have seen the disasters of events like “Jonestown” where whole communities were decimated by the influence of one man.
We should note however that there is positive “PEER PRESSURE” and the apostle Paul, who unequivocally had runs on the board, suggested that he was a pattern to follow, as found in, 1 Corinthians 11:1 PATTERN YOURSELVES after me [follow my example], as I imitate and follow Christ (the Messiah). It is appropriate to note that Paul was recommending his “EXAMPLE” or in the terms we are employing, his “INFLUENCE”. 1 Peter 1:16 For it is written, YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY.
No matter how pressured you feel you always have the option of saying NO. As people who want and are determined to follow the Lord and the directions of the Word, we need to be able to discern “Distraction”, both internal and external and be prepared to deal with it.
All things are LEGAL but not all things are EXPEDIENT (1 Corinthians 6:12) and so we “learn by experience”, that is, we encounter PEER PRESSURE, but bring the Word of God to bear and respond to a sensitive conscience, dismissing the concern of consequence of “not fitting in”.
The statement “all things are legal” can serve some to excuse behaviour/attitude which is not becoming for a Christian. The apostle was intimately acquainted with the “legal” due to his previous career/vocation as a Pharisee, so he was not advocating matters that were obviously illegal.
For example, it is quite legal for me to sleep in the morning but not expedient when I know the Lord wants to meet with his people early. It is legal for me to make numerous trips to the buffet but not expedient, and Proverbs 23:2 puts it like this, (CEV) Don’t go and stuff yourself! That would be just the same as cutting your throat”.
Expedient means “fit, suitable, appropriate to, or for a purpose,” a simple assessment to guide and control our behaviour/attitude
Paul and Titus were subject to “PEER PRESSURE” of a different kind to that which we may be exposed, but their motivation and objective was exactly the same as ours should be, the preservation of the truth.
Galatians 2:5 To them we did not yield submission even for a moment, that the truth of the Gospel might continue to be [preserved] for you [in its purity].
Paul and Titus were impervious to PEER PRESSURE they didn’t even have to think about it, “even for a moment”. So sensitive was their spirit/conscience and so steeped were they in the Truth, the interlopers didn’t get to 1st base.
But before we begin to think that we can be completely isolated from the influences of other people the apostle Paul again very clearly defines the conditions under which he functioned, and we may also have to contend, though probably not to the same degree. Even though the reading is extensive it is worth the effort as the apostle explains that in all these areas he complies with the situation for a very positive result, for the redemption of those who would exert their influence. There was no suggestion of any self-interest or advantage in his behaviour.
1 Corinthians 9:19 – (to 27) FOR ALTHOUGH I AM FREE IN EVERY WAY FROM ANYONE’S CONTROL, (In other words, he was free from PEER PRESSURE … comments mine) I have made myself a bondservant to everyone SO THAT I might gain the more [for Christ]. (It is a good thing to examine our motives, the “SO THAT” of our decision)
“We can be distracted by what others want for, or from us. Sometimes those closest to us, the ones we love and who know us best, aren’t the ones who will help us get to “what’s next”. Their agenda frequently is bereft of either direction of the Word or the mind of the spirit. Paul says it so powerfully in, Galatians 1, you can almost hear the strident tones in his voice as we read this.
What are we here for!? Whose opinion matters in the end? Let me answer this on his behalf: we are not here to be the person others think we should be. WE ARE HERE TO BECOME THE PERSON GOD CREATED US TO BE, WITH NO APOLOGIES AND NO COMPROMISES.
Galatians 1:10 Now am I trying to win the favour of men, or of God? DO I SEEK TO PLEASE MEN? If I were still seeking popularity with men, I should not be a bond-servant of Christ (the Messiah).
Peers (aka “people”) influence our life, even while we don’t realize it, it occurs simply by our being in contact with people. We learn from them, and depending on their disposition, it can be for BETTER or for WORSE. Paul said, “1 Corinthians 5:9 I wrote you in my [previous] letter not to associate [closely and habitually] with unchaste (impure) people.” See also Galatians 2:12 – 13
It is natural to listen to and learn from other people and can only be to our disadvantage if we are not strong enough to refute ideals and principles that do not comply with what we know the Word of God requires.
Back in Old Testament times, this phenomenon was recognised and recorded in Malachi 3:16 promotes the demographic that is conducive to our spiritual wellbeing and the frequency with which discussion should be conducted.
There are those who would claim to be Christian but find it inconvenient to fellowship at the House of the Lord, or to engage in Bible study. They readily take part in activities nominated by their peers which more often than not takes place at the same time as “church”.
The exhortation in Malachi 3:16-18 comes after the exposure of those who have been vocal and influential in the negative sense (Verses 13-15)
But more than that, it highlights the nature of folk who have learned the secret of “Reverence and Worshipful Fear”, “they loved the Lord”. They develop this by belonging to a “REVERENT AND WORSHIPFUL SPHERE”. See what Solomon had to say.
Proverbs:21 My son, [REVERENTLY] FEAR (the Lord and the king, and DO NOT ASSOCIATE with those who are given to change [of allegiance, and are revolutionary], (Think “SECULARISATION” of the church …. comments mine)
The promise of Malachi 3:17 should be adequate motivation for us to engage in this pattern of behaviour. See the proclamation of the Lord as to His pride and possession of such a company, “My special possession, My peculiar treasure”.
But verse 18 defines the ability and activity to differentiate “PEER PRESSURE”, the recognition of those who would be of advantage and those who would influence us inappropriately.
Malachi 3:16-18 (V 16) Then those who feared the Lord TALKED OFTEN ONE TO ANOTHER; and the Lord listened and heard it, and a book of remembrance was written before Him of those who reverenced and worshipfully feared the Lord and who thought on His name. (V 17) And they shall be Mine, says the Lord of hosts, in that day when I PUBLICLY RECOGNIZE and OPENLY DECLARE them to be My jewels (My special possession, My peculiar treasure). And I will spare them, as a man spares his own son who serves him. (V 18) THEN SHALL YOU RETURN AND DISCERN BETWEEN THE RIGHTEOUS AND THE WICKED, BETWEEN HIM WHO SERVES GOD AND HIM WHO DOES NOT SERVE HIM.
A distinct line of demarcation is drawn between those “PEERS” whose influence we should accommodate and those “PEERS” we should avoid. I know many will wish to cavil with this concept, citing scripture invoking charitable behaviour, and this I do not discount, but warn, that unless you are soaked in God’s Word, comply with the suggestions for daily performance of the preservatives of scripture, regularly engage in dialogue with those of a spiritually ambitious nature, then your attitudes can be influenced inappropriately by a lack of discernment as per Malachi 3:18.
Romans 12:2 goes on to establish a clearly defined apodosis when it says “do not be conformed” following with “so that”.
Romans 12:2 DO NOT BE CONFORMED (Another word is “DEFORMED” or improperly influenced … comments mine) to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], (Another way of saying “be careful of peer pressure” … comments mine) but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], SO THAT YOU MAY PROVE [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight FOR YOU].
If we are not “discerning”, we are not able to refute those whose ideals conflict, to know unequivocally what is “good, acceptable and perfect will of God”, specifically as it applies individually, then we need to re-evaluate our “TRANSFORMATION”. “TRANSFORMATION” is an event that occurs when something passes from one state or phase to another.” TRANSFORMING is different to TRANSITION, which is the act of changing. This is a state of flux, a state of uncertainty about what should be done, ever-changing, and often involves “double-mindedness”.
We live in a wonderful age, where technology enables our access to incalculable resources through mobile devices and Internet access, expanding and enlarging not only materials for education or entertainment but to a wide range of people, policies and disciplines. Should we take a few minutes to walk the main street of any town, ride a bus or train, visit a beach or a bun fight, we will readily observe that the mobile phone or tablet dominates the attention of the masses, accompanied by disassociation from face to face relations.
“PEER PRESSURE” in the sphere of technology demands that we have the latest device, consult with it not just regularly but consistently, be seen to be “IT” competent and up-to-date with the happenings of the world so that we do not appear ignorant.
This also is “PEER PRESSURE” which in time might prove to be the resource of choice for the agents of evil who already are trawling personal details to influence our purchasing choices in the most benign ways, to scamming our bank accounts and stealing our privacy. Recently the Marriot hotel chain lost control of 500 million individuals records when their system was hacked. So, the question now is, “what sort of peer pressure can be applied to those individuals?”
But more insidious is the “PEER PRESSURE” emerging from those who are not our “PEERS” but our “RESPONSIBILITY”. Parents today are seemingly helpless in the face of demand by their children for devices, with claim for unrestricted access to all and any content at all hours of the day until we are now faced with a generation who are “addicted” to the perverse influence of technology. Don’t think for a moment we are immune to this effect, the prevalence of email and SMS messaging dictates that communications must be answered forthwith or else there is something wrong. The requirement is that we leap to action to meet the expectations of “PEERS” in any corner of the globe with alacrity.
Oh, that the Word of God was as highly engaging as the mobile device, where any spare moment could be used to review the divine communications instead of trawling the internet and patronising the browser for our source of influence.
Proverbs 11:11 By the blessing of THE INFLUENCE OF THE UPRIGHT and God’s favor [because of them] the city is exalted, but it is overthrown by the mouth of the wicked.
In the context of Proverbs 11 we can change the word “INFLUENCE” to that of “PEER PRESSURE”, and in this case, the peer pressure is for good, but notice it is the “WORDS” of the wicked, or inappropriate influence.
There are consequences of not fitting in, of embracing the reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord, and it is not just having a thick skin, but a finely-honed sensitivity to what is demanded of us if we want to spend eternity with the Lord.
Matthew 5:10-11 Blessed and happy and enviably fortunate and spiritually prosperous (in the state in which the born-again child of God enjoys and finds satisfaction in God’s favour and salvation, REGARDLESS OF HIS OUTWARD CONDITIONS) are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake (for being and doing right), for THEIRS IS THE KINGDOM OF HEAVEN! Blessed (happy, to be envied, and spiritually prosperous–with life-joy and satisfaction in God’s favour and salvation, REGARDLESS OF YOUR OUTWARD CONDITIONS) are you when people revile you and persecute you and say all kinds of evil things against you falsely on My account. Be glad and supremely joyful, (same as the “WHOLLY JOYFUL” of James 1:2) for your reward in heaven is great (strong and intense), for in this same way people persecuted the prophets who were before you.
1 Peter 3:13-14 Now who is there to hurt you if you are zealous followers of that which is good? But even in case you should suffer for the sake of righteousness, [you are] blessed (happy, to be envied). DO NOT DREAD OR BE AFRAID OF THEIR THREATS, NOR BE DISTURBED [BY THEIR OPPOSITION].
Ross Smith 